Meanwhile… This Puppy Has A Mustache

Meanwhile… This Puppy Has A Mustache

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YOU KNOW, I SPEND MOST OF MY
TIME OVER THERE, MARIE KONDO-ING THE DAY’S BIG STORIES INTO THE
PERFECTLY-ORGANIZED NEWS CLOSET THAT IS MY MONOLOGUE. BUT SOMETIMES I LIKE TO ROOT
AROUND IN THE NEWS CRAWLSPACE FOR THE UNREAD MAGAZINES, THE
OLD CAMP T-SHIRTS, AND THE BROKEN LITE BRITES THAT NO
LONGER SPARK JOY, I THANK THEM FOR THEIR SERVICE, TOSS THEM IN
A CINCH SACK, THEN LEAN OUT MY CAR WINDOW AND DROP IT INTO THE
SALVATION ARMY DONATION BIN THAT IS MY SEGMENT:
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) “MEANWHILE” HEALS A NATION. IT SOOTHES THE TROUBLED SOUL OF
THIS GREAT EXPERIMENT WE CALL DEMOCRACY! MEANWHILE, PASSENGERS ABOARD A
SPIRIT AIRLINES FLIGHT WERE IN FOR A SURPRISE ON WEDNESDAY WHEN
A BAT APPEARED AND FLEW BACK AND FORTH THROUGH THE CABIN. HERE IT COMES AGAIN. THERE IT GOES. YEAH, THERE IT GOES AGAIN! I KNOW THAT’S KIIND OF SHOCKING,
BUT IN SPIRIT AIRLINES’ DEFENSE, THEIR SLOGAN IS, “LOOK, YOU WANT
TO FLY TO CHICAGO FOR 60 BUCKS? YOU GET BATS.” ( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE ) MEANWHILE– IF YOU’RE LUCKY! IF YOU’RE LUCKY YOU GET BATS! THE ONLY THING I’VE EVER SEEN ON
SPIRIT AIRLINES IS RACCOONS. MEANWHILE, A DOG SHELTER HERE IN
NEW YORK SAYS THAT “AN ADORABLE PUPPY WITH A ‘MUSTACHE’ ALREADY
HAS A LONG LIST OF FAMILIES WAITING TO ADOPT HER.” THE PUPPY WENT VIRAL LAST WEEK
THANKS TO HER UNIQUE MUSTACHE-LIKE MARKINGS. BUT FOR SOME REASON, THERE’S
STILL NO INTEREST IN HER BROTHER. AND TO WHOEVER– HELLO. AND WHOEVER ENDS UP ADOPTING
DOLLY, THE NAME OF THE DOG HERE, I JUST HAVE ONE REQUEST:
PLEASE DRESS HER UP LIKE A LITTLE SALOON OWNER. THIS IS NOT–
( APPLAUSE ) THIS ISN’T EVEN A SETUP FOR A
JOKE, IT’S JUST SOMETHING MY WRITER, KATE SIDLEY, THINKS
WOULD BE ADORABLE AND I AGREE WITH HER. IF SALOON OWNER ISN’T POSSIBLE,
KATE WILL ALSO ACCEPT DOLLY AS A DASTARDLY VILLAIN TYING A
HAMSTER TO TRAIN TRACKS, DOLLY AS TOM SELLECK IN “MAGNUM P.I.” OR DOLLY AS 1972 BURT REYNOLDS. ( LAUGHTER )
MEANWHILE– THAT’S KEY. THAT’S KEY– KEY PAW PLACEMENT. MEANWHILE, COORS LIGHT HAS JUST
BRANDED ITSELF THE OFFICIAL BEER OF “DRINKING IN THE SHOWER.” THAT’S ACTUALLY AN UPGRADE. PREVIOUSLY, IT WAS THE OFFICIAL
BEER OF WEEPING IN YOUR EX-WIFE’S BIRDBATH. CHECK OUT THIS LITTLE AD THEY
ACTUALLY MADE: ♪ ♪ ♪
>>Stephen: COORS LIGHT AND ♪ ♪ ♪
>>Stephen: COORS LIGHT AND TAKING A SHOWER ARE THE
PERFECT MATCH. YOU’RE GOING TO CATCH SOME WATER
IN YOUR MOUTH ANYWAY– WHY NOT MAKE IT A cORS LIGHT? MAKE IT A COORS LIGHT? THAT’S GOOD– ACTUALLY, TONIGHT,
I’M GOING HOME AND DOING THIS. ALSO, CAN I JUST ASK WHY IT SAYS
“DO NOT ATTEMPT?” ( LAUGHTER )
I AM SICK OF COMMERCIALS TELLING ME NOT TO DO THE THING THEY’RE
DOING IN THEIR COMMERCIAL. IF I WANT TO GO OFF-ROADING IN
THE ARCTIC IN MY FORD F-150 LIKE YOU DID, FORD, THAT’S MY
BUSINESS. AND IF I SIDESWIPE A TREE AND
GET STRANDED ON A FROZEN LAKEBED AND HAVE TO EAT MY OWN FOOT
UNTIL I’M RESCUED, THE FIRST THING I’M GONNA DO IS GO
STRAIGHT HOME AND SHOWER OFF WITH A NICE COORS LIGHT. BUT, HEY, GETTING PEOPLE–
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪ ♪ ♪
BUT, HEY, GETTING PEOPLE TO CONSUME YOUR PRODUCT IN THE
SHOWER IS A WHOLE NEW PROFIT AV
AND OTHER BRANDS ARE ALREADY GETTING ON BOARD. JIM?>>AFTER A LONG DAY THERE’S
NOTHING LIKE A HOT SHOWER. BUT IF YOU’RE ALSO HUNGRY,
THERE’S BON GELDER SHOWER CHILI. WHILE OTHER CHILIES CAN BE THIN
AND WATERED DOWN, BON GELDER’S IS THICK AND CHUNKY AND CAN TAKE
THE HEAT AND IT’S PERFECTLY SEASONED, GIVING YOU THE KICK
YOU NEED WHILE HOSING OFF. SO THE NEXT TIME YOU’RE STEPPING
INTO THE SHOWER, CRACK OPEN A CAN OF BON GELDER SHOWER CHILI. THE OFFICIAL CHILI OF EATING
CHILI IN THE SHOWER.

100 thoughts on “Meanwhile… This Puppy Has A Mustache

  • Spooki Post author

    This guy looks like one of my old high school teachers… he was a dick

  • Carrie Ann LaShelle Post author

    The Gypsy Kings! with Coors Light?? $$$$$

  • Xa Le Post author

    False Video Title, shoulda called this "Chilies in the Shower," way more meaningful/powerful.

  • Emily An Post author

    in downtown Vancouver on July 20, 2019. A parade followed.

  • Supercalifragilisticthisbesuchadopekid Post author

    On Instagram Hamilton the Cat has a mustache too.

  • IWillTakeAGuranteeOfBetterOverAPromiseOfPerfect Post author

    Lol I'll buy a pack of Coors just for the silly effort.

  • Alt Fit Post author

    "ORANGE MAN" – COLBERT
    *GASP* – AUDIENCE
    "BAD" – COLBERT
    "WOOOOO" *CLAP CLAP CLAP* – AUDIENCE

  • Mr. Deluxe Express Post author

    Love the Gipsy Kings! Best part of this video.. glad they got some air time (Coors Light commercial song)
    Challenge: I dare any of you to listen to "Volare" by Gipsy Kings, and NOT feel like you just LOVE LIFE 😀 I bet you can't do it 😉 (song is about flying because of love; like Superman)

  • Olivia Quezada Post author

    I think shower beers are so popular because it gets you more drunk. The shower raises your body temperature making the alcohol hit harder. Same concept as drinking in a hot tub.

  • kly rand Post author

    shower chili XD

  • ppkeaton Post author

    This is it. Once stephens writers run out of jokes about trump they resort to a dog with a mustache…

  • ice checksolvea Post author

    3:13 already been doing that for years with a cold red Gatorade. try it sometime its nice in a hot shower.

  • Fred Derf Post author

    I was going to comment of the stupidity of drinking alcohol in the shower (considering the number of people injured or killed falling in the shower each year) then I remembered it was Coor's Light.

  • Rafaela Marta Post author

    MARLOS

  • Jeff Putnam Post author

    This is entertainment… maybe for sheep. Come on Pee wee… you can do better!

  • talikhar Post author

    At least nobody tried to open a window or door to let the bat fly out LOL!

  • Monk Amani Post author

    WWW.GothamSteel.com 🍳
    NEW Ceramic Non-stick Frying pan
    Get them while they lasts.
    Only $19.95 + shipping and handling
    Buy one, get one.

    What? You thought buy one get one free? (Tariffs) You must have voted for Trump. Pans will be $ 50.00 + shipping and handling come September.
    Get them while you have food to fry.
    Okay, you'll get the bonus pan.
    It's been rough.

    Hindsight20/20

  • Catherine Post author

    Step 1. Go to Google

    Step 2. Search this keyword: 123moviestoday

    Step 3. Enjoy!

    Hayabusa…it’s one of the fastest production motorcycles in the world. Believe me when I say you’ll never ride on another motorcycle after you feel the power this baby has. It is unlike anything you’ll ever feel between your legs.

    She is a soft, deadly creature. Kind and timid and terrifying. She's completely out of control and has no idea what she's capable of. And even though she hates me, I can't help but be fascinated by her. I'm enchanted by her pretend-innocence; jealous, even, of the power she wields so unwittingly.

  • d now Post author

    I think Colbert actually spends most of his time not being funny.

  • MadriFilmArt Post author

    Great writing, so funny…

  • Lucius1958 Post author

    Oh, come on: with that bowler hat, they didn't go for "Dolly Poirot"?

  • Jayde Blackmar Post author

    Love you Stephen… but not everything has to be a Holocaust/Hitler joke.

  • The Way Post author

    Flash those devil horns (Thumbnail pic). We know who really employs you.

  • Robert Scott Post author

    The coors in the shower thing is likely a nod to a recent Margot Robbie interview where she said her favorite thing to do after a long day on set was have a beer while in the shower. It kind of makes sense after filming for sixteen hours when you have to do it again tomorrow for the next two months- I bet it's a super-fast way to end up very relaxed, and ready for bed…

  • Fresh Peppers Post author

    When a dog has a better moustache than you.

  • Scott McLaughlin Post author

    What about that Trump, am I right guys?

  • Elmo Japanochas Post author

    It's Mumbo Jumbo's dog

  • G M Post author

    How's your pathetic politician sister doing ??? She got on her knees for Trump, he zipped up and didn't donate to her CAMPAIGN..hahaha

  • Jayyy Zeee Post author

    Drinking a beer in the shower to start one's day doesn't seem at all problematic /s
    Seriously though "Do not attempt".

  • Jayyy Zeee Post author

    Shower chili? For efficiency, I prefer toilet chili, but to each their own.

  • dennis bryan Post author

    People should stop talking about politics and start talking about puppies who doesn't love puppies and it wouldn't drive anyone crazy

  • Ptao Tom Post author

    it was Coor's Light.

  • James Lee Post author

    Meanwhile, Colbert still SUCKS………..

  • Deathnote2539 Post author

    Omfg the whole advertisement business is just full of idiots none of them know how to make a commercials I remember the 90's we actually had good commercials hell I'd even watch some of them lol now a days no one even fucking watches cable it's all internet xD no one fucking watches normal TV or even sees ads unless its YouTube

  • Ricky Jackson Post author

    Bob sagat finally run out of trump jokes?

  • JRPanda Post author

    People drink in the shower? Sounds like an alcohol problem

  • Rameez shahid Post author

    The puppy is a Nf fan

  • Classy Post author

    Yoooo NF dog

  • A Doggy's World Post author

    That's a cute puppy.

  • country city Post author

    and you need duct tape 👉🏼 😷 over your big mouth…

  • Charming nowhere to hide Post author

    Oh, come on: with that bowler hat, they didn't go for "Dolly Poirot"?

  • psz_ atrapa Post author

    this dog is a nf fan

  • Геннадий Козлов Post author

    Аминь юдофашистким людоедам.Аминь.

  • J Chung Post author

    Gang Gang! Thumbnail

  • Dan Giles Post author

    Ya gotta be impressed with the writers coming up with these amazing introductions week after week!

  • Damián Flores Post author

    Best Meanwhile introduction I remember.

  • Fluffy Talguw Post author

    I like that hitler puppy joke 🤣

  • Fluffy Talguw Post author

    Dolly is the new Mr. Winkle

  • Kittems Post author

    Who drinks in the shower… what were they thinking?

  • Mathieu Leader Post author

    the dog with the moustache needs to a detective called Hercule Doggo

  • junglechick13 Post author

    I hope they paid Gypsy Kings big bucks for that ad music…I guess Sex Pistols version wasn't available?

  • Mike Scarborough Post author

    A good weed buzz kicking in halfway through your shower is something that should be on everyone's bucket list. Okay, it's just a stoner thing, but still; try it.

  • voodoochile333 Post author

    No it doesn't

  • Blue Steel Post author

    Geez, been a long time since I drank beer in the shower. That is such a teenager move to do.

  • James Ezell Post author

    Coors lite tastes like shower water

  • Anthony Camacho Post author

    I had a good friend who loved having a shower beer. Now he has crippling alcoholism. COINCIDENCE? ABSOLUTELY.

  • Abdel Aziz Post author

    Eat my own foot hahahaha

  • Brian De Bold Post author

    How did this guy get h8s job?

  • Jiang Boxb Post author

    That's a cute puppy.

  • phennec Post author

    I'm so grossed out by the shower men that I can't watch the rest of this video.

  • Warren Smith Post author

    Is drinking anything in a shower really "a thing"? Could they be suggesting that the beer should be chugged in order to keep the shower short?

  • J O Post author

    Sally is a real asset and deserves a raise lol

  • Viscera Trocar Post author

    Drinking in the shower sounds monumentally stupid to me. Especially if that wasn't his first beer of the evening.

  • SideTV Post author

    Step 1. Go to Google

    Step 2. Search this keyword: 123moviestoday

    Step 3. Enjoy!

    Love and intimacy are at the root of what makes us sick and what makes us well, what causes sadness and what brings happiness, what makes us suffer and what leads to healing. … I am not aware of any other factor in medicine—not diet, not smoking, not exercise, not stress, not genetics, not drugs, not surgery—that has a greater impact on our quality of life, incidence of illness, and premature death from all causes.

  • james edmondson Post author

    Interesting that Coors Lite was playing MEXICAN music (in the shower???) – WTF? Is this the only way immigrant CHILDREN can get a shower in their cages??? What kind of beer is needed for them to have tooth paste and tooth brushes (Dos Equis)? Will it take Tequila to be REUNITED with their parents??? Americans (who love Mexican food: "The largest segment of the ethnic foods market in the United States appears to be Mexican, comprising 62%") don't seem to realize that the majority of immigrants SEEKING ASYLUM are from South America – NOT MEXICO.

  • 초록연기 Post author

    Do not attempt lol

  • Q S Post author

    Propaganda with a fake audience to laugh at every shitty joke thrown at working Americans.

  • Bts Jung Cooky Post author

    OM this is dog is so cute

  • FrostedRaps Post author

    What a chili-ng commerical.

  • Cory Δguilar Post author

    lol u people

  • baboKeisari Post author

    Whoo, more Django!

  • Turd Ferg Post author

    Meanwhile Stephen Colbert is still and idiot

  • SideTV Post author

    Step 1. Go to Google

    Step 2. Search this keyword: 123moviestoday

    Step 3. Enjoy!

    Lie to her. If she understands syntax, she will understand your need to lie. Behind words are other things: motivation, value, nuance, dialogue. It will not be the end of the world.

    Fail her. Because a girl who reads knows that failure always leads up to the climax. Because girls who read understand that all things must come to end, but that you can always write a sequel. That you can begin again and again and still be the hero. That life is meant to have a villain or two.

  • aola wili Post author

    Geez, been a long time since I drank beer in the shower. That is such a teenager move to do.

  • Moi S Post author

    Forget the puppy – love the chili in the shower skit – especially that final shot!

  • 1217 BC Post author

    That shower chili add… I just threw up in my mouth a little

  • tyler thompson Post author

    How will the asshole blame Trump for this?

  • Nathan Weaver Post author

    this is the man who bashes trump his iq is probably 1

  • Samuel Smith Post author

    “Do not attempt”: same reason windshield shades say to not drive with shade in place. Because of lawyers and stooopid people.

  • Tickled Funny Bone Post author

    I like to shave in the shower……. so…… um yeah.

  • Robert matheny Post author

    When I’m running really late I find it making toast in the shower is a huge timesaver

  • ligairi Post author

    Shout-out to professional snowboarder Peter Line who has been eating spaghetti in the shower since True Life in 2002.

  • Numb Nutz Post author

    And I thought shower chilli is what you got when you sharted yourself in the shower!

  • Laura Willits Post author

    May you never run out of "Meanwhile" metaphors.

  • smitikovski Post author

    Nice wordplay! But am I the only one that ever enjoyed a cold beer in the shower? I don't see the problem 😅

  • single batch23 Post author

    Colbert is just jelly because hes so soyed out he cant grow a mustache….his boyfriend can milk his little titties though

  • panas midi Post author

    Propaganda with a fake audience to laugh at every shitty joke thrown at working Americans.

  • Gal Dagon Post author

    Give that woman a raise.

  • railspony Post author

    I'd pay extra for a flight with bats for entertainment. Forget a movie, give me some wildlife to distract me from being stuck in a flying tin can. As long as they screen them for rabies they won't hurt anybody.

  • Dave Everyman Post author

    Every joke was spot on!

  • less kiss Post author

    Whoo, more Django!

  • Epic gamer libtard troll Post author

    Steven Colbert can actually make political humor that's just "drumpf bad" actually funny what the fuck

  • apostolis x Post author

    Was that an Adolf Hitler mustache?

  • Deep hug Post author

    Awesome video!

  • Elmer Alvarado Post author

    The shower bit was disturbing

  • G FOX Post author

    Shower beers is already a thing in the part of Australia I am from🇦🇺🍺👍🏻

  • Sean Knutson Post author

    "Meanwhile" is a breath of fresh air compared to America's usual political smog.

  • Kimberly Jameson Post author

    You suck!!

  • Roonasaur Post author

    "Oh, I'll just open this can of beer right in the shower spray."

    Said, No One Who's EVER Drank in the Shower.

  • Anime Dumpster Fire Post author

    So how did y'all decide which writer would step into a shower with a bowl of chili?

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